How Old Are You in Teapot Years?

Many people compare their lifespan to other creatures by saying something like “In human years that dog is 50.” Well, having a teapot that is roughly 7 years old but who thinks he’s more like 40 years old, it started me wondering how old I was in terms of the average lifespan of a teapot. Time to get out the calculator to see how things add up.

Some things age faster than others, burning brightly and briefly. When compared to human years, they can seem fleeting indeed. Also, since there is a lot of variation between individual creatures, humans, and teapots on how long they last from initial creation to death, we had to come up with an average and apply it in our chart.

But first, what is a teapot year?

I took the average lifespan of a human (see chart) and compared it to the average lifespan (from creation until it is so broken that you can no longer use it to steep tea) of a teapot and did a ratio. Just being old did not qualify a teapot to serve as a standard. The teapot also had to be usable, even if it was not being used (such as a usable teapot in a museum display). The oldest I found was from 1900. That makes it 116 years old right now. So for every year you live, your teapot “ages” only .57 years.

Now to the chart

The animal ages during one calendar year the number of human years and teapot years shown:

Animal Human Years Avg. Human Lifespan Teapot Years
.57 116.00
Human 1.00 66 37.55
Ass 1.78 37 21.10
Bear 2.00 33 18.78
Cat 3.20 21 11.73
Chicken 5.33 12 7.05
Cow 3.64 18 10.32
Deer 2.29 29 16.40
Dog 3.64 18 10.32
Duck 4.21 16 8.92
Elephant 1.14 58 32.94
Fox 5.71 12 6.58
Goat 5.33 12 7.05
Groundhog 5.71 12 6.58
Guinea pig 10.00 7 3.76
Hamster, golden 20.00 3 1.88
Hippopotamus 1.78 37 21.10
Horse 2.00 33 18.78
Kangaroo 8.89 7 4.22
Lion 2.29 29 16.40
Monkey 3.20 21 11.73
Mouse 20.00 3 1.88
Parakeet (Budgerigar) 4.44 15 8.46
Pig 3.20 21 11.73
Pigeon 7.27 9 5.17
Rabbit 8.89 7 4.22
Rat 26.67 2 1.41
Sheep 5.33 12 7.05
Squirrel 5.00 13 7.51
Wolf 4.44 15 8.46

source

So, how old are YOU in teapot years?

Just multiple your human years by .57 to get your age in teapot years. You may be “younger” than you think.

Some examples:

Human Age Teapot Years
18 10.26
26 14.82
34 19.38
42 23.94
50 28.50
58 33.06
66 37.62

© 2016-2020 A.C. Cargill photos and text

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